Spring cleaning is not for sissies
Some historians will swear that top to bottom housecleaning originated in Persia, over 3000 years ago, and was part of the new year – Norouz – celebrations held on the first day of spring. Others assert that, around the same time, Hebrews did the same for Jewish Easter festival – Pessah – in the spring too.
So, now is the time to do it! We’ll delegate most of the work to Raymond because housework is a very risky business. Apart from the obvious burns, bumps, bruises and backache, we know very little about another danger: the effects of the 100 000 toxic chemicals lurking in conventional household cleaning products. So, as a would be MacGyverette, we minimize the damages with efficolonomical – efficient, eco-friendly and economical – cleaners.
To encourage Raymond to partake in an activity he rarely indulges in, we remind him that housework is excellent exercise. By playing dust Terminators, he will break a good sweat, work his biceps and, if he pushes the vacuum cleaner while clenching his buttocks, his will unquestionably enhance his gluteus maximus. We’ll insist on him wearing his military sleeveless jacket to show off his beautiful muscular arms, which we’ll admire adoringly. After this, we can ask him to wash the floor tiles with black soap, the IT beauty care product for floors.
In a beautiful bucket, we delicately pour 3 doses of liquid olive oil or hemp oil soap, we add 3 litres of hot water – i.e. 1 dose of soap per litre of water – and 2 tablespoons of white vinegar. We mix the lot with an elegant hand gesture and give it to Raymond. All he needs to do is to wash and dry the floor with a dry cloth. No need to rinse it.
Cleaning built-up oven grime is another big task, but we have a pain free recipe. The secret ingredients are timing and liquid olive oil soap. Julie Bousquet Fabre recommends applying it on the encrusted interior while the oven is still warm. Do this in the evening and let soap work its magic during the night. The following morning – not necessarily at the crack of dawn, if you prefer a lie in – just rinse everything off with warm water and jump with joy at the result. To prevent the oven getting coated in carbon again, give it a final rinse with your dear friend, the white vinegar.
Et voilà! Not only is everything sparkling clean, but total cost for cleaning products for floors, bathroom and kitchen equipment does not exceed 2 euros per month. Great news for recessionistas and other budgetary cut victims!